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My father has a ❤️ heart and my mother has a 🧠 brain.

Maybe it takes a couple of times in a hospital for an old-fashioned father to start showing his heart. Don't get too close to him though...he will bite you at the first sight of the slightless sign of anything close to tenderness...

I am doing it anyway, I remember his poker astonished face and following resigned hug back a couple of months ago when me, the daughter that was never there but was always scared of him, suddenly hanged myself from him like a koala. I don't mind. We don't talk the same language in many ways, but I have found a little tiny opening in his armour for me.

He has a heart, but still he is himself. My sister has sent me this drawing he did today, a (sort of) Christmas card...My father, the atheist, the spartan man pouring his love and dedication into this drawing for all of us... you can see all our names there.

My mother is quite reluctant to all his artistic expressions, whether they are poetries or drawings. That's because they, too, talk different languages. I can understand her: for her and her self constrained emotionallity, written words of love have no value when they don't translate into actions. And they don't translate into actions for her often. Sadly.

My mother is all actions of love, silent grounded daily love, when she cooks, she is "talking" love to you. She is a not so many words person, but a many many actions person. When despite the pain in her legs, she drags herself in the house like a giant motherly crab to cook something she knows you like a lot, she is actioning love. When she makes the effort of telling you with clumsy words something from inside that big mystery that is her inside world, she is talking love to you.

I have been welcoming that inside world of her, a side that has always been overcasted by my father's words and self importance. And...oh she brilliant. I always fear NASA will kidnapp her because through silent observation in her daily life, she is mastering theories I then see backed up by experts in youtube... With her silent calmness, she has been turning conclusions and insights into intuitive wisdom so precise that I cannot but marvel. From the most grounded subject to the Universe and beyond, that is what we talk about.

I am discovering my father has a ❤️ heart and words, my mother has a brain 🧠and actions.

Drawing of a tree, birds and names of the family, like a Christmas card
My father's drawing

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